How do I seem to others? How often do you think and wonder what other people think of you? What they think of what you say, what you do, how they will react when… ?
And then we are told that “You should not care about what others think!” – however no-one really tells us HOW to do that?
How to get to a space where what other people think doesn’t stop you?
Would you be willing to look at this from a slightly different point of view?
What if you were willing to be aware of what other people think? Note, AWARE; not project or expect what they think or how they will react. And then use that to create what you would like!
If you allowed yourself to be aware of what points of view other people have, what belief systems they function from, you can start looking at what you say and what you do in a different way.
It’s no longer about letting other people stop you or diminish you; now it becomes a play where you can choose what you do.
When you are aware of how your words and actions affect other people, you can start looking at each situation from the perspective of “Ok, what would I like to achieve here? What would I like to create here? What result would I like from this?”
When you get clear on what your target is, you can then ask- What does this person require to hear (for us to accomplish what we desire to create)?- How does this person see me? What can I do or say to affect them in a way that works for me? How can I affect them in a way that creates the result I’m looking for?
Have you been told that you always need to tell the truth? The problem with that is that we all have our own truths about everything; how we think things work, what is good and what is bad, what we believe in… So you might be presenting what you think is the truth of you, and the other person will look at you and judge you to be lying, all based on their belief systems.
This approach has been incredibly helpful for me in countless situations. Recent one is finding a new home; when I go to see an apartment or house, I ask; what can I wear that will make me look like a perfect tenant for this apartment? What does this person need to hear? What kinds of questions do I need to ask? How do I present myself?
It’s not about what is right or wrong, nor is it about giving yourself up to please others. In fact it’s quite the opposite; when you truly have your own back and know what you desire to create, you won’t let anyone stop you. You will use whatever is available to create what you would like.